She just watches him, processing. She knows Joel wouldn't ditch a little girl if he couldn't be sure she was in good hands, and she knows he would have fought with her if she let him, even if it meant both of them dying, or him putting her down himself, and then where would he be? Where would Ellie be?

Her lips part, but nothing comes out. There are things she doesn't say to Joel, not when she can't be sure they'll land well. She realizes some seconds later that she's holding her breath.

"So you kept her," she says. Her intention to be neutral fails her; her voice comes out flecked with concern. She knew it was a hard lean. "That's a pretty intense job, Joel. I didn't..."

Didn't what? She meant every bit of what she said back there.